Sunday, March 12, 2006

Why I Should Be a Translator

Today we will be taking a short, visual tour of why I should be hired to do translation from Chinese into English. The first product is below.

teeth-grinding sticks

I saw this box of teeth-grinding sticks in the grocery store I frequent. Of course, seeing the name of the product, I immediately picked up the box to read about what it was. I saw the English first, and then read the Chinese. Of course, they're teething cookies for babies, but let me tell you what the side of the box said in English. (Spacing and spelling errors are intentional.).

Yantai Baby-joy Group company,which is specialized in producing babies and children's food, has rich experience more than 50 years.We add Xylitol in new teeth-grinding sticks,so the product is specially designed for growing milk-teeth babies.Grinding and protecting the teeth,the teeth will be more healthy!

Characteristics of the Baby-joy teeth-grinding sticks biscuit:

- It is suitable for growing milk-teeth baby.
- Moderate hardness makes baby's teeth comfortable,at the same time, it can temper baby's chewing ability.
- Finger-shaped stick helps to temper baby's grabbing ability.
- No pigment, no preservatives.

Eating method:

- Let baby sit on and you must be on the scene.
- Wash baby's hands, let himseld sieze teeth-grinding sticks, grinding his teeth slowly.

I am tempted to write Yantai Baby-joy Group to tell them two things: 1) I am willing to translate for them, and 2) their teeth-grinding sticks taste terrible, and they did not grind my teeth one bit.

The second thing I'd like to show is a t-shirt I bought yesterday. For this, I would like to not hire better translators. This kind of thing makes me feel like I'm in China, and the convoluted English is part of the charm.

radic shirt

If you can't see clearly what is written on the shirt, it is:


The Brilliant Environment Which Is Always Lively

Chimp & Giant

The Impact That Electrity Is Flow Away
live happily and pleasantly

Feel The Vibes
There Is Amusement Of Sincerity In The Minor World, And There Is Actual Freedom

The strangest part of this is that I feel like I understand this English. I've learned to take alot of English that is never used, and often very wrong, and understand its meaning. I'm getting a second language while living here. The back of the shirt is this:

back of radic shirt

Again, if it isn't clear, it says:


As for the world's being happy, the thing which it has many people know is desirable.

it is pleasant to say that it acts freely about this free world.

That it does. That it does.


At 10:25 AM, Anonymous Yada said...

hehe. you should submit some of these to

At 10:46 PM, Anonymous Carl Yuan said...

They have had it since Feb 27, 2006.


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